OMFG crispy hashbrowns.

Are you hungover? This will cure it.

Are you hungry? This will cure that.

Do you have a venereal disease? This will not cure that. But even the clap is better with hashbrowns.

How do you make these heavenly taters?


  • Oil to fry and a little left over for your ashy knees. Handle that.
  • 2 large white potatoes
  • 1 small onion chopped up well
  • 1 tablespoon Garlic powder
  • 1 1/2 teaspoons salt and pepper each- potatoes suck up salt like kate moss at a cocaine buffet so ………….
  • Italian seasoning to taste
  • 10 leaves fresh parsley


This recipe is pretty easy so if you fuck this up I’m going to put a link here on how to tie your shoes because you probably need help with that too


Start by wrapping your potatoes in wet paper towels. Microwave them for about 8-10 minutes, OR, using the potato setting on your microwave.

File_000 (5)


While this is microwaving heat up about 1/4 a cup of oil in a pan on medium high.

Cut the potatoes into small cubes


Add your potatoes and onions to the hot oil. Sprinkle salt, pepper, onion powder and Italian seasoning on top and cover with a plate. This is the trick to crispy potatoes. Press the plate down firmly and cook on medium for 10 minutes.

Flip them over with a spatula and again press them down with the plate. Cook for another ten minutes.

Repeat this until the potatoes are as brown as you want them to be. Remove the plate and sprinkle your parsley on top. For me to get these potatoes as crispy as they were i cooked them for about 25 minutes.

How easy was that? Not as easy as you babe. Not as easy as you.


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