Vegan Chocolate Pudding

Few things in life are as rewarding as chocolate pudding. The only thing I can think of that’s more rewarding is throwing pennies out your moon roof onto people who ride your ass. ┬áPersonally I would rather that than a hormonal childless shrew from staten island with the mouth of a trucker. Consider yourself lucky.

This pudding is good. There should be a porn with this pudding in it somewhere, that’s how good it is. This could be the start of a new business.

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Peanut Butter and Apple Truffles

Vegan

Apples and peanut butter go together like hookers and blow. They’re a match made in heaven. So in honor of that relationship I thought we would make balls, lightly dusted in a cocoa powder concoction that will make you want to swallow them whole. If only you did that for your ex, maybe he would have stuck around.

So how do you make these tasty little treats? Watch and learn.

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Baked Cinnamon and PB Apples

Vegan

Apples are the downfall of man. Eve slipped one to Adam right before the party police came and made them put clothes on. The evil queen slipped one to Snow White. It seems like apples are the original Ruffie.

So when I eat one I want to make it a special moment. I want to savor it. And I want to eat the whole thing. No one shares apples. They are an individual fruit. Selfish. I like selfish.

Preheat your oven to 375.

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